slow paranoia

confusing times again, thisisalloneword is several steps to the left of some other reality – this other reality being the one that a lot of other people seem to be in. But no no no, it’s just the onslaught of fresh waves of paranoia, full moons and neap tides (or is that spring tides? I forget) gently shift his position out of line, his feverish imagination pushed wilder and higher onto the rocks of a continent of doubt and uncertainty. Ho ho. He is trying to work things out on his own again but, and we should stress this point, that might not be the best plan. He has thought of finding someone but his needs are not necessarily their needs and, anyway, the whole process of sounding someone out isn’t easy. People can shy away from slow questioning, change the subject and push themselves that wee bit further away. Maybe you have become the outside man of an in-joke that isn’t funny any more. Maybe everything is coincidence all along and its just all in the mind. But to find out requires you to reveal your whole hand and to place yourself somewhere new, somewhere yet more distant and removed. So what do you do? To act and lose all quickly, or to wait and lose all slowly? To sleep, perchance…?